Category Archives: obsessive compulsive

Words

I was awake much of last night, thinking, crying, anxious, frightened almost. I wrote in my diary and listened to music that can sometimes settle me but last night, nothing. It was a bad night. Dark thoughts, wanting to just … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, depression, insomnia, obsessive compulsive, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Two steps forward…

…one step back. Or what feels like two steps back. He’s back in hospital. He was feeling unwell for a few days and then he went really poorly on Thursday and was readmitted while they work out what’s wrong. Turns … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, depression, liver transplant, mental health, music, obsessive compulsive, OCD | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

I’ve been down this road before…

The last few days have been very difficult. I have felt a recurrence of symptoms of my depression and been frightened by what that means. Is it coming back? Do the signs point to another long trip downhill? I don’t … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, depression, mental health, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Refuge

I am feeling everything and anything today. So many intrusive thoughts, so much anxiety, so much painful loss. Trying very, very hard to keep going with the CBT tools.  Trying so very hard to maintain a sense of reality and … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, Fear, mental health, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

And Now There’s Ruby.

Counselling is going very well. I’m slowly but surely battering the OCD into submission. I have a few new tics and oddities to rein in but I’m coping. I have strategies. I have confidence. It’s very hard work, I have … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, mental health, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

It’s just a ride.

It has been a week of up and down. I am dealing well with the OCD behaviours and making some good progress and I’m happy about that. But I have been in very low mood, dwelling on the last 8 … Continue reading

Posted in liver transplant, mental health, obsessive compulsive, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Therapy. Again.

It’s been a rough few days. Raging paranoia, anxiety, panic, sadness, mania, all flooding through me, as bad as it has been for a long time. I’ve been practising compassion-focussed therapy and it is such hard work to get to … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, counting, Fear, mental health, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

So, Therapy, pt 2

The GP referral was fast. I had my  IAPT assessment this morning. I met an amazing woman who I will call Jill, who listened to my shit for 50 minutes and then gets to go away and sort out what … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, Fear, mental health, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

I’ve been quiet

for a few days. Recovering myself. Feeling better. Damping down my anxieties and just sitting with what I feel and letting it be there. I feel really good for doing it; I feel well and calm and not anxious for … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, counting, Fear, happy, mental health, music, obsessive compulsive | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment